My Resting Bitch Face

My resting bitch face is basically my face. When I am resting, I look like a bitch. I’d say it’s a pretty fair analysis too. I’m 20% tired, 15% content with my resting, 30% deep thinking, 35% not thinking about what my face looks like to you.

My resting bitch face is something that I’ve accepted. Kanye West is a perfect poster boy for the look and apparently, so am I. A part of me is proud to give off an unwelcoming vibe because unless I’m smiling, I don’t want to interact. I’ve worked in customer facing jobs before where I’ve been genuinely swept off my feet with work and a cheeky customer has told me to ‘smile love’. Excuse me, dear stranger, but I am smiling on the inside but now you’ve made me pissed – I’ll glare at you instead. I honestly can’t help that my facial muscles relax in such a way that you think I’m a class A cow. They’re just chilling. For those that know me, I’d say I have a pretty happy demeanour about me and I’m actually a very sociable person. My ‘bite me‘ face is something of a facade. I’m probably just tired from smiling all day and you’ve caught me off guard. That being said, I’m also moody at times. Like any human being – I get off days. On my off days my resting bitch face will be a genuine representation of what I’m feeling on the inside. Pure cba. But, more often than not – I’ll welcome a greeting.

When people first meet me, I occasionally get the comment, ‘Oh – you’re so much nicer than I thought you’d be’. 

‘Why? Was it my face?’

‘Um. Yeah.’

‘Oh.’

I mean, I need to have a word with my facial muscles. Girls, will you whip yourselves up into a botox smile every moment of the day! The world is watching and you gotta be out to play! 

That’s me talking to my facial muscles right there. Yup..just to clarify that one ^^^.

To be honest, for a short while, I thought I needed to transform my ‘attitude’. Maybe my resting bitch face was an attitudinal problem. After all, my resting face gives off a look of accidental annoyance, judgement and boredom. It’s a master of a look, especially when on the whole, I don’t mean to look like it. My face is very transparent usually, however. If you irritate me – you’ll be able to tell. If I think you’re the world – then I’ll let you know. I am a good actress with some and can hide my true feelings but my general approach is – life is too short. It’s an ongoing joke, (my face), to friends and family. It shows my true colours – except for when I’m resting!

I got real with myself and thought, no, it’s not attitude, it’s actually just my face. I can be sitting on my own and look like this. I can take a picture or have my picture taken and my face will be my signature – ‘resting bitch face’. I can’t help it. It’s like telling Pinocchio to grow skin! Without a Fairy to do the magic – he’s not going to be a real boy with skin to replace the wood. I don’t have any Fairies on speed dial to help me out! Plus I’m not into the idea of plastic surgery. Love yo’self and all that.

First impressions are everything but then they’re also a challenge. My silent first given impression is one of pure mood. A first impression of me when I’m talking (which is always) is an extrovert, friendly, people-welcoming person. I am also an anxious person, which surprises a lot of people when I tell them I struggle with severe anxiety. I appear confident, together and ‘cool’. But, on the inside I’m often shaking with worry about something ridiculous. The saying ‘Don’t judge a book by its cover’ should also apply to human faces. But, we are humans and we all make judgements. Part of human intelligence is to be able to recognise facial expression and their relationship to the human emotion. Therefore, I understand if you think I’m a bit peeved because you’ve made a judgement based on the expression of my face. It’s something our ancient ancestors had to master. The emotional facial indicator. An angry face looks red, blotchy and well, ugly. When someone is angry, generally, you try to make it better or leave the situation. So, thankfully I don’t have an angry resting face. That would be more inconvenient I guess.

I am in awe of people I pass on the street who walk along with happy faces. I think they must have flown to L.A and got a surgeon to stitch their smile into place. They don’t even have to be having any form of interaction and there they are – beaming and delighted. They look like a Cheshire Cat. It is a bit unnerving. But, based on that judgement – they are either meant for the Disney films or are clinically insane. They’re also lucky. At any given situation – they’re smiling…I suppose that could get a bit awkward if there as a disaster happening and there they were – psycho and smiling. But, kudos. I’m just jealous of your smiling demeanour. You go cheesey!

So, what is it about our resting faces that makes us so defined? Well, like I said above – it’s the first impression someone gets of you. Your face. They don’t stare at your feet when they meet you (unless they are uncomfortably shy or socially awkward), they stare at your face. Their brain takes in the picture of your face. It recognises your face as a person and an emotion. Their brain makes a judgement and you, as ‘the face’, will either confirm or over-ride their judgement. In my case, unless I’m aware that someone is looking at me, their judgement will be – ‘Oh, she’s having a bad day.’. Contrastingly if I know you’re staring at me I might give you a smile.

My resting bitch face is partly me but I am so much more. Please, before you make a judgement – say hi..unless I am actually having a bad day..

Toodles! Love the resting bitch face x

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