The future used to scare the s**t out of me. (And yeah, I feel like I need to censor swearwords even though I am the most explicit person you’ll ever meet in real life.)
The future is anything you want it to be in theory. If you work hard, you get a lot in return. Essentially you are in control of your life to some extent…and that extend is a lot. Cue panic induced self-pressure.
‘So, Holly, what are you going to do with your life and how are you going to get there?
This is a question that I been asked a few times over the past three years. Of course, I made positive steps to getting a career in an industry that I love. I was and still am pretty chuffed about that. Last year also saw me moving out, moving in with my boyfriend and becoming a full blown adult of sorts. But, I still don’t know how to bake a cake successfully, let alone raise myself to be the person I want to be.
When we are smaller, more youthful and thus far more naive – other people raise us. Life at that point is pretty damn easy. Even in High School we don’t have to think about our own assignments and what we need to do in order to pass a test. We are guided. Our opinions are often influenced by the people who raise us and we are pulled along by our elders until we fall into the pit of adulthood. I say ‘the pit of adulthood’ because really you do feel like you’re falling down a massive, gaping, meteor hole in the earth at the time of growing up. It’s like someone’s snapped your puppet strings. You’re just left to skydive, headfirst into the unknown and the worst part is – NO ONE TELLS YOU HOW FREAKING HARD IT’S GOING TO BE! Yeah, that was good to get off my chest..
Once you’re in this pit of uncertainty a few things can happen;
SOME OF YOUR FRIENDS GET LEFT BEHIND
Well, it’s true. Not everyone falls into the adulthood pit as quickly as you do. It can be tricky because they can no longer relate to life in the pits. Hell, it can be hard. But there they are, still being guided and spoon-fed while you’re down there falling on your arse every now and then. It’s frustrating but c’est la vie! You’ve just got to get over it. I certainly fell down into the pit at what seemed like 100mph. I didn’t even realise what had hit me when my boyfriend asked me to research energy suppliers.
What?! I don’t have the first clue about energy suppliers?!
Well just Google it then and let me know.
Conversations about things that I hadn’t EVER thought about before were happening. They were stressful and overwhelming. ‘Why didn’t someone tell me about this before?!’ I would outburst.
But it’s true – NO ONE TELLS YOU ANYTHING.
So, when I don’t even know what energy supplier to choose, how am I suppose to know which yellow brick road to walk down?
ONCE YOU’RE IN THE PIT, THERE’S NO ESCAPING IT
I called it a pit for a reason. Once you’re down there, you’re down there. You have to wait for your friends to come along with you but it might take them years. In fact, when you talk about the pit some often don’t have a clue what you’re talking about. Well, of course because you’re just looking at me down here and laughing thinking – ‘poor sod’.
So, before I get invested into talking about ‘the pit’ anymore – I guess I should just face the facts that I’ve got to think about my future.
I’ve got plans. Of course I do. They consist of; travelling, saving money to buy a house, buy a puppy (or 12), learn to cook like a boss, earn a good buck, write a book, develop my skills, start a family, marriage etc….. And they’re in no order whatsoever. My future plans are well – future! In an interview you’ll often get the question; ‘Where do you see yourself in five years?’
‘Well, Jill, I can see myself in the same predicament that I’m in now. I’m in the pit. A few of my mates have fallen in…we’re chatting about adulthood and reminiscing of times when someone wiped our butts for us. Oh, sorry – did I get off topic?’
I guess what my sarcastic self is trying to say is – we cannot know what or where we will be in the future. To be honest, I’m trying to avoid thinking about it entirely. When I think about the future I seem to get immediately overwhelmed. There are so many plans that I need to put into place. There are so many goals that I want to achieve.
BUT – what needs to be acknowledged is the immediate future and this is something that I am trying to do. Instead of getting overwhelmed with what’s ahead in five years time, I’m going to focus on a game plan. My game plan will be productive but will also concentrate on the present moment. Each moment we have at present is contributing to our future. If we are stressing and being counterproductive, our ideal future is going to be further from our grasp. So, a few steps into the right direction, for me personally, will be;
Yikes. This one feels like someone has slapped a hammer onto my head (much like my empty, china piggy bank that I cracked open with hope one day – only to confirm that yes, I am penniless). A lot of my money goes towards the cost of living. In fact, I’d say about 75% of my monthly wage goes entirely towards keeping myself alive. This is depressing. It means that I barely have a penny to my name when the end of the month arrives. 20% of my wage then goes on small social luxuries; the cinema, a few beverages with friends, car park costings (yup – a luxurious spend) and makeup.. Then, I’m left with 5%. At this point I feel bitter and treat myself with the 5% that’s left with something from ASOS. But, I suppose if I’m being sensible, that 5% that’s left should go into savings. My boyfriend and I are desperate to live in a nice, new build house. We are sick of renting and we want out!! So, dear ASOS, I’ve loved you but I’ve got to think of my nice semi-detached.
DEVELOPING MY SKILLS
There is a lot of software out there that will help to make me more employable. I work in media and a lot of my job is to just create. I will continue to develop my skills using software and finally get my head around Adobe and all of its packages!!
PUTTING MYSELF OUT THERE
I am a super confident person. But when it comes to being online, I can be like a little scared mouse. I need to shout from the rooftops – ‘INCOMING NEW BLOG POST’ and I need to invest time into doing this. I will also continue to push myself in my workplace and accept new challenges and projects with excitement!
MAKE A SPREADSHEET
Man, this feels like something a thirty-something would do weekly. But, I need to make a spreadsheet. In fact, for the first time ever – I need to open Excel. I need an organised spreadsheet for finances and combine them with household costs/rent. Currently neither my boyfriend or I have the faintest idea how much we spend monthly. THIS IS BAD. It means that we are probably spending money we don’t have and it’s trés irresponsible.
Whew – now my brain hurts.
So, to get the jist – think about the here and now. You can make goals for the future and create forthcoming targets. But – let’s avoid the stressful questions shall we, Jill?
Our future is something to get excited about!!
Yay for the future!
Yay to us for surviving thinking about it at all!
(ps: Sorry if your name is Jill. She was a fictional character that I made up for this blog post for impact. It’s a fab name..hey girl.)